By myself

Despite many guidance and advice offered
Never before have I experienced
Being at such a complete state of loss
Despite the presence of so many people around
Among all the roads I’ve chosen
Never before have I traveled
Along one that is lonelier

For each and every joke that I heard
I found nobody to really laugh from the heart with
For each and every new song I knew
I had nobody to sing with the whole body with
For each and every story I heard
I found nobody to pass it meaningfully to
For each and every event along the way
I found nobody to truly share it with

There were some at some different times
Who showed that they do care
Who asked if they could share bits and pieces with me
But I didn’t want them to stay
There were others at other different times
Who touched me in ways I would never forget
Whom I want to share my days and nights with
But they didn’t stay for long, just like they never promised to

And so I continued to be by myself
Laughing at jokes, singing new songs
Listening to stories, living my life
And until I find someone
Whom I can share the rest of forever with
I’ll just continue to be by myself

29 Dec 98 12:22 noon